Monday, September 06, 2010


Janet & Jan
Janet Chester Bly


A friend and I discussed the points of a sermon we heard Sunday morning. We both agreed that even though we know that God loves us … one of the hardest things we struggle with is feeling free to be ourselves. We don’t want to offend. We don’t want to stand out. We want others to like us.

We both shared times when we acted out, or blurted words, perhaps part of our true natures, that reaped embarrassment or guilt.  We’ve blown it. This caused us sometimes to be reticent to say or do anything in a similar situation again.

“How do I release the dumb things I’ve said or done and find relief to be the person I really am?” she asked.

We all dread dredging up past painful memories. When we’ve done wrong things. Or failed to do something right. We fired lightning sparks in the situation, instead of enlightenment. We flunk the tests of life. Guilt’s our grade.

But at least guilt’s better than a dead conscience. Still, finding a way to reconcile, to make peace with ourselves, with others, with God … that’s glorious. Working through the trips of guilt proves our spirits are alive. We’re responsible persons. We’re accountable citizens. We’re spiritual beings. We repent, turn around, and go the other way.

In all sorts of moods and weather, finding true inner peace when we disappoint ourselves, when we hurt others, can take a long time if …
We won’t admit it when we’re wrong.
We know we’re wrong, but we’re full of excuses … such as, blame others.
We’re unable to admit we’re capable of wounding words or fatal flaws.
We refuse to apologize without qualifiers.
We’re unable to accept forgiveness and go on.
We fail to realize we’re as faulty as those we judge.
We won’t allow God to heal us, to put us together again, as only he can.

We make peace with shame when we give our moral failure to God’s Son, Jesus (1 John 1:9). We call it what it is. We place a name to the deed.

My friend and I discussed the need to transfer every detail of wronged relationships and their aftermath to God, our best Friend.  To surrender to his wise and powerful keeping everyone involved and affected.

When we depend on him to make crooked places straight, when we do a free-fall into his love, his acceptance, his grace … we rid ourselves of remorse. We release that best part of us we call personality, our unique gift to the world. He heals our souls.

“They looked to Him and were radiant, and their faces were not ashamed” (Psalm 34:5 NKJV).

When do you experience the most freedom to fully be yourself … and have no need for later regrets?

You may download the free article, “31 Days To Win The Fight For Personal Peace” at


Connie Sue said... hit me at home (as usual). I know that "myself" isn't always comfy and I can feel "less than" in some situations. This happened the other day as we went to Billings. We visited an elderly friend who is in a rehabilitation home. Her brother was there who has been a missionary for years. Between those 2, Edie and her daughter and my darlin', all of a sudden I felt like a fish out of water discussing spiritual things. I knew that was ridiculous but the feeling was still there. As I prayed for our friend with the group there I had to realize that God uses us as long as we are willing....God does not give us that feeling of insecurity and He will use me, warts and all! Thanks for this reminder...God uses this and other ways to show me how much He loves me and will continue to "do a good work in me". That verse is awesome (“They looked to Him and were radiant, and their faces were not ashamed” (Psalm 34:5 NKJV). Thanks so much.

Janet Bly said...

Connie Sue: Thanks so much for sharing your experience. Very well expressed.